The First Day...

Today is the first day of the rest of my life...

Exciting but kind of strange to say because it is true, as of tomorrow my relationship with food will take on a new meaning.

I have embraced and am completely ready for this change, I am educated and ready to go.

Honestly I am! This is not just like my dad would say "Jaw Music" I am not just saying it, I truly mean it.

I am blessed and I expect to be continued to be blessed

In case you are wondering and if you want to come visit me if you are in the San Diego area...Or, if you just want to keep me in your prayers...

Here is where I will be...

Scripps Mercy Hospital
4077 5th ave
San Diego Ca.92103
619-294-8111

My Pre-op is Today at 3:00

My Surgery is Tomorrow at noon

I should be staying in the hospital three days.

The Lord is my Strength and my Song

See Ya Next Week!!!

Support

Part of my surgery education process was to attend a Bariatric Support Group.

The Group at Kaiser my health insurance was booked so I found another local group.
The first time I went I was hoping it would not be a bunch of whiners that would discourage me.

I should have had more faith, I am forgetting God is opening the doors for this journey in my life... How wrong I was, I found a wonderful group of people who were happy and grateful about their choice which made me even more grateful about mine.

Yesterday I went to my last support group before my surgery and I had some real questions I knew could only be answered by someone who had been through the procedure and sure enough,I got nothing but loving and encouraging answers.

I was blessed, and get this, I even let them take a progress picture of my BACKSIDE!! Yikes!!!

I didn't make a lot of friends in my surgical prep classes and I was looking around hoping to see some familiar faces but I did not.

Until my friend Aisha came in and announced the date for her surgery is November 16th the day before me! I was so excited and we decided we will walk the halls together and help each other along the way.

After the meeting was over my friend Cassandra came up to me and said she was seven days out from having her surgery and said she felt good. How encouraging it was to see that after just seven days she felt well enough to go to group.

I know I have been placed here for a reason, God loves his Troysie...

If you want to do something with me on the Second Saturday of a month, Sorry, I have plans. Hanging out with my new pals.

Support

One of the requirements of my pre-surgery education class was to attend a Bariatriac patient support group.

whoopie, whoopie finger making circles in the air, so with not very much enthusiasm I went.

What I found was AMAZING encouragement. A room FULL of people in all degrees of the process from several years out to just 10 days out.

It was awesome to see the peoples transformation and hear their stories.

Today I am going to my last support group prior to my surgery, I know I will be blessed.

I am excited to take my "Before" picture...

I feel like I am done

I am feeling so mentally prepared for my upcoming journey, I have been so prayerful and I believe the Lord has removed the desire for me to stray from my diet and exercise plan.

That is the only way I can explain it.

I have easily said No thank you to All Halloween Candy, Chips, Junk Food, and anything else not on my diet. I simply have no desire.

I have exercised every day this week without question and hesitation and a very willing and dedicated heart.

Each day I have rejoiced and thanked the Lord for this newfound commitment.

I am blessed

Getting Closer Every Day...

I am less that two weeks away from my surgery... Wow! I cant hardly believe it!

Each day that goes by makes my heart jump a little bit more.

I say I am educated and prepared and yes I am educated and prepared...

BUT...

I really have no idea what will happen to my body after this surgery, will I shrivel into a sack of skin, or get all curvy and cutsie like the gals on the Nutri System commercials...

I just don't know...

Saw some Christmas shirts and thought of getting one, then I remembered I have no idea what size I will be at Christmas so I passed on getting it for now.

We will just have to see... The Saga Continues...

Mum's The Word

Only five more days til I am off of work...

Feeling excited...

I know I am basically an open person, I hide very little but I have made a decision...

I am going to keep my weight numbers to myself. A lady doesn't tell her age which I don't care about, I'm almost 49. I am excited to have my birthday next week when I will become "Forty-Fine" that means next year I will be "Nifty Fifty"

Age-Smage

Weight however... Let's leave the numbers alone...

16 days and counting...

Gosh, just 7 more days of work until I am off for my surgery.

I took an additional day off just to have a full day off of rest before my weight loss journey begins.I felt good about taking the extra day, U

THEN,I looked at the school calendar and realized with Veteran's day (which is my birthday) and a furlough day I will have two more days off!!!

God is so good and again has shown his love for his Princess Troysie.

I was given an instruction sheet from the doctor giving me basic guidelines that I must do. I am taking lots of vitamins, mega dieting, and exercising a ton.

Here is my prayer for today...

Dear Lord, please help me to develop a heart for exercise, please give me drive to continue and passion for pushing myself to do more and more each day.

Just the fact that I have gone to the gym two days in a row and took a nice walk around my neighborhood has amazed me and I feel like I have made a good start.

Praying for my heart...

And Counting...

November 1st...17 days and counting... How do I feel?

Well, I am beginning to feel like things are getting close, and I have a lot to do...

I have a check list from the doctor which I am doing...

Dieting, Exercising, Taking protein shakes and vitamins...

House getting in order...

Check, Check, Check...

Each day I am getting closer...

Yesterday was Halloween and I was wearing my cute Trick Or Treat tee shirt, I love it, long sleeved and extra comfy... Then I realized...I won't wear this shirt again... Next year it will be too big... Wow... Then I realized...

I will eventually get rid of ALL of my clothes... What a concept...

17 days...

Countdown

I graduated from my "Options" class on June 28Th and I was given a date for surgery timeline of anywhere from four to six months...

I was so sure I was going to be in the "four" month group instead of the "Six" month group so I mentally prepared myself for a late September surgery...

Tick Tock, Tick Tock, Tick Tock...Time went by with no call...

I began to worry, I began stress...

Then God reminded me that when I stress and worry I am not being faithful...

Sorry Lord, you have opened all these doors, you have given me confirmation after confirmation that I am doing the right thing so who am I to doubt you...

Sorry Lord... Peace of mind followed...

Last Monday on my day off bright and early my cellphone rang and I missed the call...

Message-"Hello, I am calling to give Troy Miller HER (they didn't even call me a boy) surgery date"

YIKES!!!!! Do I want to return the call... YIKES!!!!!

Of course I returned the call... "Your Surgery date is November 17Th"

My first thought after getting emotional and calling Leigh Ann for a shoulder to cry on was "What a sucky date" Just before Thanksgiving, my holidays will be all messed up... Selfish thoughts...

But Gods Timing is Perfect... After I was done with my "Stinkin' Thinkin'" I realized this is the PERFECT time for my surgery...

First of all come on, let's face it, the entire reason I am here today is that I need to readjust my relationship with food forever so why not start at the most "eating" time of the year... It is the perfect time for me to really put my new lessons learned into play and I got excited...

Secondly, I was hiding a secret from my husband, I did not have enough vacation/sick hours accumulated to cover my time off so I had no real idea how much my recovery would cost in wages... Well, again Gods timing is perfect and with Thanksgiving and Christmas vacations I will have enough time to cover my time off without losing money...

Hallelujah!!! God loves his Princess Troysie (I know that!)

Yesterday at church I realized that in just one month, the new me adventure begins...

Let's Get Ready To RUMBLE!!!

Perfect!!!

Today I went for my pre-operation consultations with the Psychiatrist, Internist, and Surgeon and all I kept hearing is "Perfect"

I have never thought of myself as "Perfect" but since I serve a perfect God and he is opening the doors for this journey,provided me with wonderful friends who fervently prayed for me today, how could my day not be "Perfect"

First of all, I got to spend the day with one of my favorite people in the entire world, my cousin Sydney...We can laugh and joke in the worst of times, and together we breezed through all of my appointments and were done before my last scheduled appointment was even to have taken place... Score!!!

Come to find out, I am just about the perfect candidate for this surgery. Great mental state (really that's what the Dr.said) Stable life, and willing to change.

Perfect age (old enough to know better?)

And no major health issues (except for one that is the subject of all this anyways)

I was uplifted and encouraged by everyone I met... It was a blessed day...

Now the burning question... NO I DO NOT KNOW MY SURGERY DATE YET.

But I will definitely keep you posted.

Traffic was fairly light so again thanks to my prayer warriors for my travelling mercies and on my way home I was listening to the local radio station who was playing the best of the 80's & 90's... Which is right up my alley...

UNTIL... They started playing that "Butterfly Kisses" song. That song gets me EVERY TIME Wahhhhhh!!!!

But it was a good cry... Perfect end to a Perfect Day.

God is good

It Is Really Happening

Tomorrow is what I am calling my first

"Pray for me" day.

I will be spending the entire day down in San Diego with my cousin Sydney meeting with doctors in preparation for my surgery.

According to the timeline given, I should be having my surgery in less than a month.

One of my favorite words from the Bible comes to mind when I think about this day...

Selah(so what do you think about that?)It is a word of praise with a matter-of-fact quality to it.

I think of this upcoming adventure with such excitement and anticipation all I can do is praise...

SELAH!!!!

I Can Only Imagine

Every once in awhile as a school district employee I am given a tee shirt for one reason or another. Most of the time they are not my size and I give them away to a co-worker.

Today I was given a tee shirt and I saved it.

It is a size L.

I can't even imagine what it would be like to be a size XL let alone a L.

That tee shirt is a sign of encouragement to me, that this surgery will open doors creating opportunities that right now I can only imagine...

I know the day I put that shirt on and wear it to work...

I will cry.

Uncharted Territory

I always get nervous when I have to do something medical that I have never done before...

Today I will be having my first Ekg heart monitoring...

It's making my heart skip a beat...

My Heart will go on...(better with less weight)

Getting to the Heart of the matter...

Have a Heart...(Hope they find I have one)

It Is What It Is...

I Want To Say... SURE

One of first things I had to do in this journey of mine was to fill out a soul searching questionnaire asking everything needed to determine if I would be a candidate for this surgery.

When I reached the question "Why do YOU want to lose weight?" It really got me thinking...

Of course I want all the obvious, better health, more energy etc... but then I realized the true reason why I want to lose weight...

I want to say... SURE!!!

"Troy, Come up stairs to see this..." Sure...

"Want to hold the baby in your lap?" Sure...

"Want to go for a walk?" Sure...

"Want to go to a musical at a vintage theater?" Sure...

"Want to take an airplane ride?" Sure...

"Want to ride a roller coaster?" Sure...

"Can you get up on that step stool and help me paint" Sure

"Want to take a stroll with on the beach and climb some rocks?" Sure...

"Here, take a seat" Sure...

"Want to take an exercise class with me?" Sure...

"Want to stand up in front of a crowd and speak at our ladies event?" Sure...

I try to pretend that I am not limited by my weight but the more I think about it this list can go on and on...

Why do I want to lose weight? Because I want to say... SURE

It Is What It Is...

No one likes to go to the Doctors but last year I was really hesitant to go for my annual check up. I was feeling horrible and thought "Troy, you are a walking time bomb" I was sure I had it all, Diabetes, High Blood Pressure, High Cholesterol... The works.

But God gave me words of encouragement and told me "It Is What It Is". Hiding and avoiding the doctor would not make the problem go away, I had to face it, so I went, did every test that was asked of me and prayed about the outcome.

My Doctor said "Of course you feel bad, you are anemic and need iron" That I can do!

Everything else was fine.

It Is What It Is... Hope God's Word encourages you too...

Lord, Please Bless Me Today...

I am in week 10 of my 12 week course and I was told it was time for me to get my pre-op lab work done.

I really hate driving to my doctor's office, It is always very crowded and you can never find a parking place... blah blah blah. Let's face it, no one ever likes to go get lab work done...EWWWWWW Needles...

Except for one time, my girlfriend and I both needed to get some lab work done and decided to go together. We joked and laughed the entire time saying things like "Who has more fun than us" and having a "Who had more blood drawn" contest (She won cause she also had to pee in a cup)...

Moving on...

Well, of course I was a little anxious but then I remembered God's re-assuring words to me "It Is What It Is" and I was fine. When I parked I said a little prayer over this part of my journey and simply asked "Lord, please Bless me today"

As usual it was very crowded and I almost left. "It Is What It Is" OK, I will go in...

To my surprise, there was no line in the lab and my number was called before I even finished my Peeing in the cup (Catching up to you Sue). I noticed one of the Phlebotomists had personalized her area with pictures of Cats and I thought to myself,"She's the one for me" Sure enough she called me over and started taking blood galore (12 vials YIKES!) We were chatting and she asked if I were having Bypass Surgery and I said yes. She then told me that she has never regretted her decision to have the surgery two years ago, we talked a little more and found we even share the same doctor whom she says doesn't give out Bariatric referrals lightly. She was so uplifting and encouraging and again told me it was the best decision she has ever made...I just had to give her a hug.

I then had to get my blood pressure taken in another part of the building. The nurse asked me why I came in and when I told her about myself she asked "Will you be having your procedure in San Diego?" Come to find out, she also had had the surgery, she went on to again confirm it was the best decision she had ever made and was amazingly informative,encouraging and uplifting. Gave her a hug too.

When I got to my car I was crying, I felt so blessed, grateful, and more confident in my decision than ever.

Thank you Lord for Blessing me. There are hundreds of workers in that office, and you guided me to two encouraging Angels named Wanda and Dianne...

All I can say is... Wow!

Giant Chairs

Different people carry their extra "Volume" in different parts of their bodies. I have tendency to have a full "downstairs" or as I call it, my Aunt Edna's A_ _.

One of the areas this weight distribution effects me the most is when I go to sit in a chair, sometimes I just don't fit. Sure it is embarrassing and is definitely on my "Reasons I want to lose weight" list but that's just the way I am...(For Now)

Recently, I was nervous when Steve told me I would be getting a Mini Cooper to drive, I was worried if my Maxi Hiney would fit in the Mini... Well, it did...

My Insurance carrier has a very thorough and involved education program when it comes to Weight Loss Surgery and the first step is orientation class.

I will never forget when I walked into the classroom and noticed that the chairs provided for us were armchairs. I thought to myself "this is just cruel" UNTIL... I got a closer look and discovered these were the biggest chairs ever!



Plenty of room for Aunt Edna and then-some... After the class I went into the restroom and two women were discussing the class...

Woman one "Well, what did you think of the class?"

Woman two "It was good, But did you ever see such huge chairs!!"

Troy Giggling...

First step on my very dignified and thoughtful journey

Climbing Stairs

Imagine carrying (or trying to carry) three 50lb bags of cement up stairs...
Of course it would be very difficult to physically carry that much weight up stairs,but our bodies are amazing and somehow it can be done.

Well, that's about what it is like to be me....

I have tried dieting for years and the most I can do on my own is lose 30 lbs. The dieting cycle for me is always the same, enthusiastic at first, then for some reason, the enthusiasm fades and the weight comes back on. I am not alone in this cycle, I have observed many of my girlfriends struggling the same as I do, they continually fight the same 20lbs and I have realized that the numbers are all relative and their struggle is the same as mine. I have accepted the limits of my willpower, I do not feel that I am weak or defeated, I Troy Miller just need a stronger tool that will help me achieve what we all want to have and maintain...A healthy body weight.

So,after much prayer, many years of carrying this weight, and bearing this burden, I have made the decision to have Gastric Bypass Weight Loss Surgery

In May 2009 I expressed interest in the surgery to my doctor, she has known me for several years and she is well aware of my struggles. I explained my reasoning to her and she said three years ago she would never have approved it but now she could tell I am ready for the challenge so she gave me the referral to begin the process required by my insurance.

In January, God gave me a word for this year "Anticipate". I have been facing the entire year with this word in mind,so I was ready when the call came in for me to begin the journey.

Excited,no. Ready yes...

Anticipation...